Monday, January 08, 2007

(click on photo to enlarge!)

Talk About Handy-Capable!

LONDON, England (AP) -- Astrophysicist Stephen Hawking says he wants to undertake a zero-gravity flight aboard an airplane this year as a precursor to a journey into space, a newspaper reported Monday.

"This year I'm planning a zero-gravity flight and to go into space in 2009," he was quoted as saying in The Daily Telegraph newspaper, through his computer, which digitizes his voice.
Hawking, 65, has said he hopes to travel on British businessman Richard Branson's Virgin Galactic service, which is scheduled to launch in 2009. The service will charge space tourists about $200,000 (about £100,000) for a two-hour suborbital trip some 87 miles (140 kilometers) above the Earth. By 2010, Hawking expects to fly into space aboard one of the space shuttles. “I want to go into space.” Hawking said.

The scientist, who uses a wheelchair and communicates with the help of a computer because he suffers from a neurological disorder called amyotrophic lateral sclerosis, has done groundbreaking research on black holes and the origins of the universe, proposing that space and time have no beginning and no end.

Because of his ALS, Hawking will have to wear a diaper and be fed with a bottle. NASA is feverishly working on shuttle modifications to accommodate his special needs. Politicos are worried that with this groundbreaking trip, NASA will have to make all shuttles ADA compliant in order to avoid stiff penalties imposed by Congress. Hawking is hoping to get a chance at the controls of the shuttle and believes he can probably fly it with his joystick, right from his wheelchair.

by d.tkon

3 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

You better copywrite this idea before southpark catches on. Absolutely marvelous. I had hoped you'd post this, with the pic, but I didn't want to get my hopes up too high. Then I opened the page and there he was. Mr. Hawking floating across the cockpit, banging his head into the instrument panels, digitizing aloud, "Are we there yet" and "Can you pee me please".

8:17 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I hope South Park DOES pick it up. They can have it. I just can't wait until I laugh again that hard.

9:21 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

>Digitized Voice< "Are we there yet?"

11:22 AM  

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