If the old saying is true…
…that we are what we eat, you may be surprised to find out what you are made of. What I set out to research was a scientific study of how much “bad stuff” is on the average person’s hands (and then extrapolate how much of that “bad stuff” is likely to make it into the average person’s diet). I didn’t find what I was looking for because I found so much other interesting stuff, I became side-tracked. But one thing we do know is that hand-washing is crucial to reducing the “bad stuff” on people’s hands, and this is especially important when the hands in question are the ones preparing our food.
Bacteria, Insects and Other “Bad Stuff”…
Now, what we know is that the bacteria found on hands are extremely small. We also know that the smaller the bug, bacteria, or “bad stuff” is, the easier it is to go undetected in our meals (until later when its had a chance to multiply in your gut - an average of 40,000 Americans get Salmonella poisoning each year).
For example, the average person will consume 8 spiders and 3 cockroaches in their lifetime. Since I don’t recall ever eating either, and I’m approximately 1/3 through my life, statistically I have probably eaten about 2.6 spiders and at least 1 cockroach, and did so while asleep.
Insects are fascinating, especially when they’re on the menu! Did you know that for every person on earth, there are an estimated 200 million insects? That’s good news, since we eat so many of them! I found out that the average chocolate bar has 8 insect legs in it (not including chocolate-dipped ants, grasshoppers or other insect-chocolate confectionary treats). Despite your attempts at avoiding it, you have probably inadvertently consumed over a pound of insects in your lifetime.
Your insect consumption adds up. Flour beetles, weevils, and other insect pests that infest granaries are milled along with the grain, finally ending up as tiny black specks in your piece of bread. Small grubs and other tiny insects can be found in your fruit and vegetables. Insects are especially common in canned and other types of processed food, and even in certain beverages. In apple orchards, the bug-infested apples are separated from the bug-free ones. What happens to the bug-infested apples? They use them to make cider; waste not, want not! It is virtually impossible that you have not ingested insects in one form or another during your lifetime. And it probably did not harm you, but instead did you some good by providing extra protein in your meal!
In fact, 100 grams of cricket contains: 121 calories, 12.9 grams of protein, 5.5 g. of fat, 5.1 g. of carbohydrates, 75.8 mg calcium, 185.3 mg. of phosphorous, 9.5 mg. of iron, 0.36 mg. of thiamin, 1.09 mg. of riboflavin, and 3.10 mg. of niacin.Compare this with ground beef, which, although it contains more protein (23.5 g.), also has 288.2 calories and a whopping 21.2 grams of fat! But I digress…
Let’s get back to the other “bad stuff”…
If we know that the average person defecates 7 pounds per day, or 2,555 pounds per year, we know that there are a lot of opportunities for the contamination of our food. After all, there are more living organisms on the skin of a single human being than there are human beings on the surface of the earth.
Don’t blame the fast-food workers for not being diligent about washing their hands; they have enough on their minds as it is. Did you know that in 1998, more fast-food employees were murdered on the job than police officers? And even if you know for certain that the fast-food workers are washing their hands after every toilet trip (I won’t mention that seven percent of Americans claim they never bathe at all), what happens when they unexpectedly sneeze? Did you know that sneeze travels out your mouth at over 100 mph? You know someone has sneezed while making your burger at some point along the way. And what about this statistic: 23% of employees say they have had sex in the office (does that include fast-food restaurants)?
Some other interesting facts: During your lifetime, you'll eat about 60,000 pounds of food. That's the weight of about 6 elephants. That’s a lot of opportunity to increase the “fecal-matter-to-food ingestion” ratio. The average American drinks about 600 sodas a year (perhaps to wash down the ton of dirt most people will ingest in their lifetime). You'll eat about 35,000 cookies in your lifetime (just don’t dunk them in milk; 32 out of 33 samples of well-known brands of milk purchased in Los Angeles and Orange counties in California had trace amounts of perchlorate. Perchlorate is the explosive component in rocket fuel – we won’t take the bait and discuss what rocket fuel and lactose intolerance might produce). But wait, there’s more…The average person will consume a total of 24 pigs, 7,300 eggs and 160 kg of chocolate in their lifetime. Surprisingly, 41% of Chinese people eat at least once a week at a fast food restaurant as compared to only 35% of Americans. So at least we have that going for us.
OK, so now that you are educated about this, what does it mean to you? Well, statistically, the more educated people are, the more likely they are to drink. George Washington spent about 7% of his annual salary on liquor. While drinking you should see if you can lick your elbow. Or you can try to fold a piece of paper 8 times. If you are drinking now, we’ll pause to give you a moment to try both….
…
Now, when drinking, be sure to stick to alcohol! You don’t know what’s in the water (WC Fields said he wouldn’t drink it “…because fish f_ck in it”, and not too long ago Orthodox rabbis warned that New York City drinking water might not be kosher; it contains harmless micro-organisms that are technically shellfish).
The amount of insects, bacteria and “bad stuff” you experience in your lifetime may be different than those quoted above, as these statistics represent the averages. Since the average person doesn’t read this blog, you’re probably above-average. But don’t be alarmed. Being above-average is good thing, since the average person laughs only 15 times a day.
By: File Boy
…that we are what we eat, you may be surprised to find out what you are made of. What I set out to research was a scientific study of how much “bad stuff” is on the average person’s hands (and then extrapolate how much of that “bad stuff” is likely to make it into the average person’s diet). I didn’t find what I was looking for because I found so much other interesting stuff, I became side-tracked. But one thing we do know is that hand-washing is crucial to reducing the “bad stuff” on people’s hands, and this is especially important when the hands in question are the ones preparing our food.
Bacteria, Insects and Other “Bad Stuff”…
Now, what we know is that the bacteria found on hands are extremely small. We also know that the smaller the bug, bacteria, or “bad stuff” is, the easier it is to go undetected in our meals (until later when its had a chance to multiply in your gut - an average of 40,000 Americans get Salmonella poisoning each year).
For example, the average person will consume 8 spiders and 3 cockroaches in their lifetime. Since I don’t recall ever eating either, and I’m approximately 1/3 through my life, statistically I have probably eaten about 2.6 spiders and at least 1 cockroach, and did so while asleep.
Insects are fascinating, especially when they’re on the menu! Did you know that for every person on earth, there are an estimated 200 million insects? That’s good news, since we eat so many of them! I found out that the average chocolate bar has 8 insect legs in it (not including chocolate-dipped ants, grasshoppers or other insect-chocolate confectionary treats). Despite your attempts at avoiding it, you have probably inadvertently consumed over a pound of insects in your lifetime.
Your insect consumption adds up. Flour beetles, weevils, and other insect pests that infest granaries are milled along with the grain, finally ending up as tiny black specks in your piece of bread. Small grubs and other tiny insects can be found in your fruit and vegetables. Insects are especially common in canned and other types of processed food, and even in certain beverages. In apple orchards, the bug-infested apples are separated from the bug-free ones. What happens to the bug-infested apples? They use them to make cider; waste not, want not! It is virtually impossible that you have not ingested insects in one form or another during your lifetime. And it probably did not harm you, but instead did you some good by providing extra protein in your meal!
In fact, 100 grams of cricket contains: 121 calories, 12.9 grams of protein, 5.5 g. of fat, 5.1 g. of carbohydrates, 75.8 mg calcium, 185.3 mg. of phosphorous, 9.5 mg. of iron, 0.36 mg. of thiamin, 1.09 mg. of riboflavin, and 3.10 mg. of niacin.Compare this with ground beef, which, although it contains more protein (23.5 g.), also has 288.2 calories and a whopping 21.2 grams of fat! But I digress…
Let’s get back to the other “bad stuff”…
If we know that the average person defecates 7 pounds per day, or 2,555 pounds per year, we know that there are a lot of opportunities for the contamination of our food. After all, there are more living organisms on the skin of a single human being than there are human beings on the surface of the earth.
Don’t blame the fast-food workers for not being diligent about washing their hands; they have enough on their minds as it is. Did you know that in 1998, more fast-food employees were murdered on the job than police officers? And even if you know for certain that the fast-food workers are washing their hands after every toilet trip (I won’t mention that seven percent of Americans claim they never bathe at all), what happens when they unexpectedly sneeze? Did you know that sneeze travels out your mouth at over 100 mph? You know someone has sneezed while making your burger at some point along the way. And what about this statistic: 23% of employees say they have had sex in the office (does that include fast-food restaurants)?
Some other interesting facts: During your lifetime, you'll eat about 60,000 pounds of food. That's the weight of about 6 elephants. That’s a lot of opportunity to increase the “fecal-matter-to-food ingestion” ratio. The average American drinks about 600 sodas a year (perhaps to wash down the ton of dirt most people will ingest in their lifetime). You'll eat about 35,000 cookies in your lifetime (just don’t dunk them in milk; 32 out of 33 samples of well-known brands of milk purchased in Los Angeles and Orange counties in California had trace amounts of perchlorate. Perchlorate is the explosive component in rocket fuel – we won’t take the bait and discuss what rocket fuel and lactose intolerance might produce). But wait, there’s more…The average person will consume a total of 24 pigs, 7,300 eggs and 160 kg of chocolate in their lifetime. Surprisingly, 41% of Chinese people eat at least once a week at a fast food restaurant as compared to only 35% of Americans. So at least we have that going for us.
OK, so now that you are educated about this, what does it mean to you? Well, statistically, the more educated people are, the more likely they are to drink. George Washington spent about 7% of his annual salary on liquor. While drinking you should see if you can lick your elbow. Or you can try to fold a piece of paper 8 times. If you are drinking now, we’ll pause to give you a moment to try both….
…
Now, when drinking, be sure to stick to alcohol! You don’t know what’s in the water (WC Fields said he wouldn’t drink it “…because fish f_ck in it”, and not too long ago Orthodox rabbis warned that New York City drinking water might not be kosher; it contains harmless micro-organisms that are technically shellfish).
The amount of insects, bacteria and “bad stuff” you experience in your lifetime may be different than those quoted above, as these statistics represent the averages. Since the average person doesn’t read this blog, you’re probably above-average. But don’t be alarmed. Being above-average is good thing, since the average person laughs only 15 times a day.
By: File Boy
posted by File Boy & D.Tkon at 8:37 AM
3 Comments:
Beautiful my son! And the picture? A work of art. This was disgusting to say the least.
By the way, I edited our profile so now people can send e-mails.
Glad to hear it (about the e-mail capability). I've been thinking for a while that we ought to invite guest-posters. I'd like to have more authors for this site, what say you? I know of a few people who I think would write some great stuff (which would add content and take the pressure off of me and you to some extent). Just throwing the idea out there.
I'm open to that. They can e-mail their submissions to us and we can post them. It would be good if they sent a picture to accompany it. If we hate it, it doesn't get posted. If it's awesome, we steal it and take credit for their brilliance! It's a no lose proposition!
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