All Points Bulletin -Be on the lookout for a man who police describe as a "bibliophile", an "angry, angry, bibliophile" who is wanted for questioning about his knowledge and possible involvement in the recent string of shootings, which have seemingly targeted married women, most having occurred in the women's bathrooms.
Police have little to go on, except for an anonymous tip, which came in the form of an e-mail from a person identified only as "File Boy".
"File Boy has given us quite a lot to go on, including a drawing of how he thinks the shootings occurred." Said Lt. Donofrio of the Wilmington Police Department. "File Boy said the shooter's nickname is 'D.Tkon'". Police are asking for anyone with any knowledge of the shooting incidents, or the whereabouts of the mysterious "D.Tkon" to come forward.
UPDATE -
Police have received numerous phone calls reporting a man running around the Christiana Mall parking lot, wearing only boxer shorts and tube socks, but otherwise fitting the description and identified as "D.Tkon" by an anonymous tipster. Police swat teams are en route to the mall's parking lot now.
We will break in with additional updates as they become available.
by File Boy
posted by File Boy & D.Tkon at 9:21 AM
3 Comments:
Nice! First of all, it’s not a “nick-name” that’s my God-given name! Really! Second of all, married women? If those chicks were married I certainly wasn’t aware of that. You certainly wouldn’t have known based on how they dressed. And for the record, I’m no longer at the mall. I’m sitting in one of those Internet cafes where you can drink three-dollar and fifty-cent espressos and eat Italian cookies with names I can’t pronounce. Christ! You should see the babes in this place!!!! They’re amazing. I don’t think any of them are really on their cell phones either. I think they only pretend to talk on the phone while they schemingly glance around at all the men and pretend not to be interested. But I can tell they’re watching . . . I know you’re looking at me baby!!! Ohhhh yeah . . . . . . . at ME!!!! And I bet those nails are fake too you bitch! YEAH YOU!! I’m talking to you you slut!!! Don’t give me that “I’m not aware you even exit look” you . . . . . Damn-it! I dropped my cookie.
You need to get your ass out of the Internet Cafe (unless that's where you draft your masterpieces) and get back to writing some posts so I can go back to putting off doing my work for another day. As I always say, "why do today, what you can do tomorrow, or after you read something funny first and get some ice cream".
Uggg! Fear not my under-entertained brother! For I've been working my F-ing ass off! I haven't lost interest, I've just been too swamped to come out and play. Let me see if I can get something up for your viewing pleasure!!!!
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